The Epic Commotion of Doom [Heh, See, Epic again! Oh, and Doom… No Epic Commotion can exist without a little Doom… Only a little, otherwise it’s Epic Doom, and that ruins the story totally.]

Who the hell is the narrator and why is the narrator always writing about rubber chickens, CAPLOCK talking ships, and a dwarf that needs to shave and take a bath? Really, what makes this narrator so blasted awesome and epic?

I DON’T KNOW BUT I LOVE THE USAGE OF AWESOME AND EPIC RIGHT THERE IN THE PLOT!

Oh shut up already ship… I, the narrator, am trying to write down the Epic Commotion of Doom.

Where was I?

EPIC AND AWESOME COMMOTION OF DOOM!

Oh yes, thank you Ship, I forgot… Okay, onward with the EPIC AND AWESOME COMMOTION OF DOOM… Err, crap, that wasn’t right… Damn you Ship!

The Narrator, who is he and why does he seem to always be there? Really. Who cares? [I do… But shhh… It’s the Commotion]